Swearing at Work

To All Staff, RE: SWEARING AT WORK It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. …

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Delia’s way verses a real woman’s way

Delia's Way: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. The Real Woman's Way: Buy Smash and keep it in the cupboard for up to a year. - -------------------------------------------------------------------- Delia's Way: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix …

Star Wars Episode 4:The Directors Cut

SW:ANH: DEATH STAR: ----------------------------------------------------------------- Ben:   You can't win, Darth. Strike me down and I'll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. During my long years on Tatooine, my old master has taught me how to save me from death itself. Vader: You don't think I'll fall for THAT one again!! SW:ESB: DAGOBAH ----------------------------------------------------------------- Yoda: …

What kids say

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a …

Fun things to do in Asda/Tesco/Sainsburys/M and S

01.    Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys when they aren't looking. 02.    Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals. 03.    Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies toilet. 04.    Walk up to an employee and tell …